Shark experts commonly insist that sharks don't target humans or even want to eat us. I guess that's kind of comforting... until you're watching Shark Week and a great white repeatedly attacks a camera, some steel beams, and a Styrofoam seal. Did he want to eat that stuff? I can't imagine any of those items were seal-flavored, yet that shark kept returning to bite them again and again.
The truth is that sharks will eat anything they find in the ocean, so if you're a thing in the ocean, a shark will eat you. As it turns out, they're not all that discriminatory when it comes to what they will or won't eat, so don't try to comfort me by pointing out that I'm not a shark's preferred meal or that I'm not the delicious sea creature he's mistaken me for. Hearing that a shark doesn't want to eat me is as comforting as hearing that a tornado doesn't want to destroy my house.
I want to be a shark expert... and looking at this diagram, I guess it's pretty obvious that I kind of already am.
Chocolate fondue bunnies?! Cute, right? I originally considered drawing a cheerful predator of some kind dipping a chick in a vat of melted marshmallow to make Peeps, but that one seemed like a stretch, mostly because I can't get by the fact that Peeps look more like elephant seals than they look like chicks, and an Easter drawing of an elephant seal getting dipped in marshmallow seemed especially confusing. That's more of a "Labor Day" thing.
Happy Easter once again, everybody!
You know how sometimes a band will disappear for a couple of years, and then they suddenly return with a "Greatest Hits" album and a reunion tour so they can get some more of your money without producing anything new? Well, as you may have noticed, it's been five months since I updated my blog... so I made this. Please send me your money.
