The Warthawk

Two days after drawing the Sealbearpig I found out that the new Toon Club topic was Crazy Crossbreeds. I didn't want to re-use something I'd already drawn for my Toon Club post, so I set out to develop something "new." I wanted it to be ugly. So what's ugly? Warthogs. Is there an animal name that sounds like "hog?" Hawk. That was the extent of my creative process. What a marvelous insight!

I have to mow the lawn again today. It's too bad the warthawk doesn't exist yet... I bet snakes would be in trouble if these things roamed the skies. Of course, I'd be in trouble too. In a world with warthawks, everything's in danger.

I just can't seem to get away from the flying pigs.

Murdering Snakes

Returning from the mailbox a couple days ago I was pants-wettingly startled to see a 3-foot snake curled up in our flower bed. I hate snakes... especially snakes that scare me so bad that my excitement about finally getting my Johnny Cash CD's in the mail is ruined. I grabbed a shovel with my jittery hands, and - well... the snake put up a good fight, but in the end the shovel was just too darn snake-splattery for him to have a chance.

Killing that snake reminded me of one time when I was mowing the lawn and accidentally ran over a snake on purpose. I remembered it like it was yesterday... because it was last Thursday. How many times do you have to run over a snake with a mulching lawn mower before its matter ceases to exist? The answer is three.

I never killed a snake in my life, and then I killed two in the space of five days. I felt bad both times, but I know if I see another one, I'll do it again. I guess I could find a way to lure the next one into a bucket and then drive it out to the canyon and release it peacefully in its new home. Yeah, that's gonna happen. And next time I see a shark at the beach I'll take it by the fin and guide it to a distant shore.

I hate snakes! And if they've been talking to each other, I'm guessing they're not too fond of me either.

Sealbearpig

After realizing yesterday that I have way too many seals, bears, and pigs on my blog, I decided to add even more. I combined all three and created a single, unattractive beast... the Sealbearpig. This keeps my blog from becoming one dimensional by adding nearly a quarter of a dimension... possibly less.

Abandoned Hog

This is one of my abandoned sketches for our Animal Farm week on Toon Club. I decided not to use it due to a few things that were bothering me. One - he looks too much like Runt from Disney's Chicken Little as a grumpy, old hog. Two - he's just standing there, and that's boring, and so is his pose. And three - pigs don't smoke.

It seems that I tend to draw an overabundance of pigs, bears, and seals. I should branch out, but I probably won't.

O Brother, What Art Thou?

In my attempt to do something Animal Farm based, I started aimlessly drawing pigs in clothes. The pig on the left was my fifth or sixth sketch. He reminded me of Pappy O'Daniel in "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" That became my inspiration. I based the rest of the drawing and colors on that theme, still trying to include the idea of the evolution of the pigs from Animal Farm.

If a pig had wings, it would be an eagle. If a pig wore clothes, it would be Charles Durning.

Shere Khan

This week's Toon Club topic was the hardest one since "Captain Hook." I really don't think there's any way to improve on the character designs that Disney used in some of their movies. Here is a disappointing version of Shere Khan... one of the best film villians ever! I especially love the scene when he picks Kaa's nose, and that villain interaction is what inspired the drawing I used. The full drawing is on Toon Club... you can check it out there. I was disappointed in the way that Louie and Kaa worked out, so I left them out of this one.

The Incriminating Bowtie

"I think that the seal with the yellow bow tie might be the one that I released into the sea after giving it the taste for mammal blood." -Gob

If you don't understand what I'm talking about, I hold YOU partially responsible. You killed it. Way to go.

Slue-Foot Sue

Ah, yes... my very first cartoon crush. Just to clarify, my crush was on the lovely, red-headed Slue-Foot Sue from Pecos Bill... not her fish. Although I guess he's kind of attractive too if that's your type. A giant fish seems an odd form of transportation for someone who lives in the desert... or any sized fish for that matter. Maybe Sue's not all there upstairs. It hardly matters to me.

Suck It

Last Friday at my wife's company's softball game, a cute, little 3-year-old in a butterfly shirt came over and asked if I wanted a piece of her candy. She held out a little mint, but I passed.

She said: "If you decide you want one later, then you can just suck it."

If you don't think that's one of the coolest things a kid's ever said, why don't you just go ahead and suck it?

Mr. Invisiblegs

It’s a good thing there’s Toon Club, or what would I ever post on my blog? I’m planning on getting around to doing something original soon, but for now it’s another double dip from Toon Club… this week’s topic: “Unnecessary Superheroes.”

I had several ideas when I began to sketch. There was The Check, who painted big, red check marks on stuff he came across... a cow, a garbage can, a police officer. He was basically compiling a checklist of things he’d seen without the paper-wasting practice of using a list.

Then there was The Elevator… a muscle-bound bellhop with a cape.

I had also considered Disapprover. He didn’t do anything to correct injustices – he just watched in the distance with arms folded, shaking his head.

I actually liked my sketch of Action Pig. He had no powers at all... just a name and a sketch. Maybe I'll post him on here someday.

Mr. Invisiblegs was born of laziness. Since I wasn’t sure which of those ideas I was going to go with, I just started sketching some designs of random superheroes that could pass for any of the ideas. On my fourth sketch, I came up with a head and upper body that I thought were working okay… so I quit. Fill in the cape, and there you go – Mr. Invisiblegs. Sometimes “lazy” is the key ingredient to an okay idea. This is the only example I can think of.

The White Rabbit

This rabbit's panic and anxiety sums up the last month of my life... I've had way too much to do and not enough time to do it. Things are starting to settle down, though. Time for a much-needed break. I better go to Disneyland.

Yeah, I know - those slippers are way to small for his feet. Have you ever tried to find bunny slippers in a size 22? Not an easy task.

When Pigs Fly

As a student several years ago, I applied to BYU's illustration program. They turned me down. I met with the head of the department to ask what I could do better. He told me I would never be an artist and I should try a different major.

Now I'm working for Disney and teaching animation and illustration classes at the same university that told me I'd never be an artist. Never? Luckily for me, "never" only takes a few years. I didn't have to wait for pigs to fly... I made them do it myself. Ah, the magic of drawing! That's why there's a flying pig on my blog's title. They've become the mascot of my career.

Little pig, not too big,
You have wings. I don't.
Should a plane fly overhead,
You may die. I won't.

I should also point out that the illustration program was right... I was terrible.

Chili with Nachos or Somethin'

As I walked through the Wal-Mart parking lot yesterday, a handsome couple inspired to me to draw this. They seemed quite concerned as they inspected the car's floor together, and as I passed I heard her say:

"Maybe you had some chili in some nachos or somethin'."

Did they disregard some substance in their car for such a long time that it had become unrecognizable? Or were they comprising a comprehensive "vomit ingredients" list? Maybe they just realized for the first time that their car and their clothes and their hair and their skin smell awful, and they were trying to find something other than their shoddy grooming habits to blame for it. Whatever the case, her comment combined with their appearance was GOLD! It was clear they needed to be featured on my blog.

Trashy, confused Wal-Mart couple who's stuck in the 80's... you're an inspiration to me.

The Old Man and the Sea

I've always loved being in the ocean... riding the waves... struggling for breath... trying to free my arms from the kelp and sea weed that entangles them... the taste of salt in my nose... and don't get me started on the deadly sea creatures. If I'm at the beach, I'm only on the beach long enough to get to the water. No resting on the sand for me - I love being in the ocean.

My favorite of all oceanic features is undertoe. I remember being told by my mom when I was a child to "be careful - the undertoe will pull you right out to sea." I didn' t really know what undertoe was, but I was very against what it intended to do to me. This old man is a victim of undertoe. Luckily for him, he has a yellow tube. He should be able to flag down a plane or a cruise ship with it, you'd think. And give him a coule more days... his sunburned skin will be visible from space. Here's a closer view of The Old Man and the Sea:

The Patient Polar Bear

Finally... a bear who has decided to branch out from the "all kid" diet. The recent theme of my blog seems to be fairly anti-seal. This wasn't intentional. I like seals. Bears like seals too... like I like donuts.

Shark-o-Phobia

I never miss a TV show about sharks. Whether it's the Discovery Channel's Shark Week or a random PBS special - if there's shark information to be had, I need it. The unfortunate side-effect to this obsession is that the more I learn about sharks, the more I fear them. The only nightmares I ever have are shark-themed... and I have at least one of them a month. I can't swim in a pool without being a little afraid of sharks. I can't sit on a couch without being a little afraid of sharks. They're following me like the Jaws family follows the Brody's... I'm sure of it.

In pretty much every shark show I've seen, some shark expert shares a common message: "We really have no reason to fear sharks. They don't intend to hurt humans. Sometimes they just mistake us for seals." And then a one-armed surfer says, "I was in the shark's home. It was just curious." Just curious! Mistake us for seals? I want shark experts and victims of shark attacks to make up my jury if I'm ever on trial.

Do shark experts really think sharks are less scary because they're maming people on accident? I don't think it's their intent that scares me as much as their ability to bite me in half.
"Help! A shark just bit my leg off!"
"Relax! He's just curious."
"Oh - thank heavens. I was a little nervous for a second there."

You know what, sharks... I don't care what you think I am. If you bite off my leg, I'm holding YOU responsible. I don't bite the limbs off of things that come into my house. Oh, but your eyesight's miserable and you don't have hands? Well then - bite away! Take both legs if there's still some confusion after the first. And thank you, shark experts. You're right - being ripped apart and killed isn't horrifying at all when you know it's just a misunderstanding. Accidental death and dismemberment is cute and fun. Let's all swim with the idiot sharks. No need to fear - they're not mean. They're just not very bright and a little bitey.

Sharks are stupid and scary... I wish there were more shows about them.

The Wizard of Oz

This is my sketch for this week's Toon Club topic... The Wizard of Oz. I haven't seen that movie in years, and if there's a book, I've never read it. If I remember right, they didn't have as much fun with the Tin Man having no heart as I would have if I had made the movie. Maybe I should have had the Tin Man lighting the Scarecrow on fire, but I just couldn't pass on the opportunity to draw a flying monkey.

If you want to see better Wizard of Oz drawings, just click on the "Toon Club" link in the right column of this page. Toon Club's worth a weekly visit... there's a new topic every week and lots of drawings to see, even when I take a three week break from posting things here.

That winged Curious George is a jerk.

Boxing Kangaroos

I went to Circus Circus in Las Vegas when I was a kid, and that's where I got my first look at a boxing kangaroo. Since then I've seen this popular form of kangaroo abuse on dispaly many times. Boxing kangaroos? How did that fad catch on? It doesn't even make sense. Let's begin with some kangaroo-ish facts.

Kangaroos have little, useless, wimpy arms. Remember the T-Rex in Jurassic Park? When he found that lawyer on the toilet, did he reach down and sucker punch him a few times or poke his eyes? No - he bit him in half! Why would anything or anyone ever attack with its weakest feature? So what do we do to the poor kangaroos whose arms are nothing more than props? We strap boxing gloves on them. It's like a rhino trying to take down its prey with a Nurf bat.

Kangaroos have incredibly powerful legs. Their legs are so strong that they can hop at a speed of 40 miles an hour and leap over obstacles as tall as 10 feet. A swift kick from a kangaroo would send you rolling backward like a bag of flour shot out of a cannon. But because of the unusual shape of their legs and their bulky tails, kangaroos can't really walk or move backward very easily. Can't walk or move backward? I've never done much boxing myself, but if I did I'd probably want to be able to walk or move backward now and then. Otherwise aren't you just a stationary punching bag? So we force the kangaroo into a sport where its greatest strength becomes its biggest weakness.

Is this the only way we can make ourselves feel superior to kangaroos? "Look what a terrible boxer he is! Man he's lame!" You want to box with an animal... get a gorilla. Save the kangaroos for field goal kicking and soccer.

In the clearing stands a kangaroo and a fighter by his trade. Poor kangaroos.

Back from Disney World

It's been two weeks since I posted anything on my blog. Time's flown while I've been trying to catch up on everything I didn't do during my week in Florida. Time to return to blogging... the vacation is over.

Disney World was great! I can't remember being more depressed at the end of a trip than I was when we got home last week. It was 85 in Orlando that day... the kids were playing in the fountains, and I was looking for a shaded bench where I could rest my tired legs. Then a few hours later we got home... and it was snowing! Snow? Going from spring to winter in one day messes with your mind and makes you unable to post to your blog for one week more than anticipated... learned that the hard way.

The parks were crowded. Fast Passes were useful. I haven't had time to draw anything, so I decided to just post a picture I took of Big Al at The Country Bear Jamboree. That's one of my favorite things at Disney World... takes me back to my childhood. I highly recommend the Disney Cast Member discount, so before your next trip to Disney World, become a Disney artist. Just don't forget your Disney ID. It turns out they really frown upon that.

A Week Without Blog

I didn't have time to draw anything today, but I wanted to add one more post to re-explain my upcoming absence... thus the cheap-looking Photoshop piece above. I'd like to thank the "circular selection tool" for providing the Mickey Mouse ears and SoundofMagic.com for supplying the font. Thanks to both of them, today's picture is truly whelming.

Tomorrow morning we fly to Orlando for a week of snowless fun at Disney World and Universal's Islands of Adventure. As much as blog-updating is going to suffer because of this, I could really use the vacation. I'll catch you all up on it when I return. So be sure to come back in a week for more stories, drawings, rants, and bear attack warnings. Gott sei mit euch bis aufs Wiedersehn.

That's My Wife!

This is my pretty wife. We've been married for 943 days... I haven't actually been counting. I've been doing the math to come up with that figure since day 939. That's enough math for a while... glad it's done. On day 946 we're going to Disney World. That is lovely... with "that" referring to both my wife and our upcoming vacation. I probably shouldn't call my wife "that." I'm digging a hole here... better start a new paragraph and forget this one ever happened.

The rest of you can come to this site when you're in the mood for an angry rant or a dumb story or more information on bears eating kids. My wife hears it every day, and then goes to sleep knowing she'll hear more of it tomorrow. What a nightmare! Putting up with me will get her into heaven, though, so she can't really complain. I love my wife. That's all I have to say for now.

Dogs vs Cats

Are you a dog person or a cat person? Hopefully you're neither. If you generally categorize yourself as either of those, you should know that everyone you've ever met categorizes you as "weird," "lame," or "creepy." For instance, if you have a dog or cat-themed calendar, choose any of the previously mentioned adjectives... they are you.

That being said, there's a good chance that you, like a lot of people, aren't crazy obsessed with either cats or dogs. Good for you. But certainly you find yourself leaning toward one as your favorite of the two. And whichever direction you tend to lean, it doesn't really matter... just as long as it's not "cats." I realize that by saying that I've effectively estranged nearly 3% of the world's population, and yet I stand by it. How can I possibly claim that dogs are better than cats? I submit proof:

Item #1: Dogs do tricks. They shake, stand, sit, roll over, speak, and play dead, among other things. A cat's best trick is coming to you when you call it, but that's more of a coincidence than a trick. You cat-lovers are probably saying, "I have a really smart cat, and it does a lot of tricks." Good for you. Do you know what you call a really smart cat? A really dumb dog.

Item #2: Most cats avoid humans. If a cat isn't starving, you never see it. When a dog hears you arriving at home, it comes running to greet you. Cats flee the room as you enter. Cats don't like you any more than I like cats.

Item #3: Cats poop in the house. Oh, you buried it. Good job. If I didn't have a nose I would barely notice you exist!

Item #4: Cats offer no services. They don't protect you or your stuff from burglars. "Beware of Cat" signs... not available. Once again - they flee the room! Ever heard of a "seeing-eye cat?" Of course not. Cats don't go where you want them to or come when you call them. A seeing-eye cat would walk you right into traffic. Hurry and tell the cat to walk you into traffic when you realize you're stepping off the curb... now your cat does two tricks.

To sum up, you don't have to have dogs all over your stationary to know that cats are generally quite lame. (If you have dogs on your stationary... poor you.)

My Very Own Office

Got this new job... got my own office. This drawing of me in my office is a little unfair, because I actually have a computer, a desk, and a phone. This isn't exactly how my new office looks, but it's exactly how it feels. The rest of my department is down the hall to the right. Sometimes I can hear them laughing or working on stuff. By the time I get there the laughing is already gone. So it's pretty much just me... sitting quietly in my office. I don't have a key card yet, so my access to the building is limited. If I go to the bathroom, I get locked out in the hall, so I have to borrow someone else's key card if I use the restroom. It's like asking your 3rd grade teacher for a hall pass, but somehow even more demeaning. Yesterday I got my hands on some paper and a pencil shortly after lunch. That was like getting a promotion... and on my very first day! I have my own office. It's quiet and flourescently lit.

4 Points!

Last month Kobe Bryant scored 81 points in a game. Then last night, I scored four. I'm not saying I'm as good as Kobe Bryant, but you can't argue with stats. In last night's game I was 2 of 3 from the field, had one assist, and hauled in an impressive three rebounds. If only I was available for fantasy teams. There were no photographers at the game, so I did this quick sketch of what my layup probably looked like. I don't remember actually touching the rim, but a point's a point. And I had FOUR of them! We lost.

The Chubby Scout

Last night while warming up for a basketball game, I saw a stout little character sprint across the court... though I am taking liberties referring to his fast paced waddle as a "sprint." His frizzy hair stood tall in a Kramer-ish way, and he was wearing a scout uniform.

Was he running across the court on a dare? Or was it already time again for his bi-annual, 30-foot jog? Maybe it was his intense love of basketball dragging his unwilling body around the gym. Whatever the case, it was surreal, and he made such a fine character that I knew he would be the subject of today's blog post. Fat, little Kramer scout... you're an inspiration to me.

I wonder if his troop ever goes on camp outs. The bears in that forest better have coolers handy, because there's gonna be leftovers.

Self Portrait

I needed to post a picture of myself so I could link it to my profile. From now on, any comment I leave on a blog will be accompanied by this eerie adaptation of me. So get used to it!

Toon Club

A few of my animation buds and I just started a new blog: Toon Club. Every Monday we're going to assign a new character or subject to draw or paint or whatever. Then during the week we'll all post our own versions of... whatever it is. It should be fun. The link to it is at the top of my "Links" list in the right column of this blog. So don't forget to visit our Toon Club occasionally as part of your internet browsing routine.

Our first subject is Oswald the Lucky Rabbit... Walt Disney's original cartoon character that he lost the rights to before creating Mickey Mouse. Disney just got Oswald back from NBC/Universal last week in a trade for Monday Night Football commentator, Al Michaels. I wonder how Al feels about being traded for an 80-year-old cartoon rabbit. Probably no worse than Oswald, who was once so close to fame, and is now so very far.

Disney & Me

This is my last week at my current job. As of next Monday, I will officially be on the Disney payroll... a Disney artist?! Who would have thought? Ever since I can remember I've been sketching Disney characters (or at least tracing them from my coloring books), watching and re-watching their movies hundreds of times, and spending every extra cent I've ever been able to afford on vacations to their parks. And now I'm a week away from being a Disney cast member! I'm going to be working for the same company that employs Jiminy Cricket, and that is cool!

The last few years at Feature Films for Families have been good. I've been able to work with some of the best friends I've ever had, and my drawing skill has improved a ton (still needs about a million more tons). For a long time, though, I've felt like I don't have the sensibilities needed to work here. As a storyboarder and writer, I tend to lean toward sarcasm and other things that Family Films doesn't want. It's frustrating that what I consider some of my biggest strengths in story telling are frequently considered weaknesses around here. My style of humor isn't inappropriate - it's just not what this place is looking for.

Next Monday I start at Avalanche Software - a video game company Disney owns. I'll be doing storyboards and hopefully some design stuff on the video games that are based on Disney's upcoming animated films. So, no - technically I'm not going to be a Disney artist, but I will be working with Disney characters for Disney, so it's close enough that I'm claiming "Disney artist." And I'll still be storyboarding, so I'm excited. Maybe this new job will eventually serve as a kind of spring board for me to get into storyboarding for films. Even if it doesn't, though, it's a huge step up for me.

It's funny because a month ago I wasn't much of a Disney fan any more. Then they bought Pixar, put John Lasseter in charge, changed their creative direction, and my feelings completely changed almost over night. In a week I'll be working for them... me and Jiminy Cricket. It's been quite a turn around. I'm going to Disney World!

Koalas Aren't Bears

Why do we call them koala bears? It's not a bear - it's a marsupial. Bears don't have pouches! It is also important to note that koalas mainly eat leaves from eucalyptus trees while real bears eat kids.

Bears Love Kids

Bears love kids like I love donuts... a tasty snack to keep them going until dinner. I used to think that bears would be fun to wrestle and play with. I was greatly misled by Baloo and Humphrey. Then I realized that news reports of wild bears wrestling children were far less frequent than reports of wild bears eating campers or scratching off their faces. I bet I could still assemble a large group of children who would gladly try to wrestle a bear if given the chance. I wonder if donuts dream of playing with me. Dream on, silly donuts.

Wo is Oscar

Do you remember when the Academy Awards used to nominate and award movies you'd seen? I do. I used to like watching the Oscars to find out who the winners were. But considering this year's "Best Picture" nominations, all I can think is... who cares?

In past years, movies like Titanic, Forrest Gump, and the last Lord of the Rings film all won Best Picture Oscars. Based on their average box office returns, it's clear that pretty much everyone saw these films. They averaged $435 million each in their U.S. releases. The average box office gross for this year's five nominated films is a miserable $37 million. I'm not saying that movies need to make a ton of money to be considered good. But with this year's Oscars, I assume most people are thinking the same thing I am: "Who cares?" If they want anyone to watch or care about the Oscars, or to grant the winners of Oscars any esteem, it's time to get back to nominating movies that people see... at least for one or two of the nominations.

So to sum up... Go, Seahawks!

Groundhog Day

What a glorious day! Today the world received further revelation from the great groundhog prophet, Punxsutawney Phil. Thanks to this particular rodent's underwhelmingly impressive ability to observe his own shadow, we should expect 6 more weeks of winter. Five weeks maybe? No - six. The future's already been foretold. Please, don't question Phil.

I decided to look into the history of this "holiday," hoping to find a morsel of sense in this great heap of madness. That bit of sense came from an 1841 journal entry written by James Morris, a Pennsylvania storekeeper. He wrote, "Last Tuesday, the 2nd, was Candlemas day, the day on which, according to the Germans, the Groundhog peeps out of his winter quarters and if he sees his shadow he pops back for another six weeks nap, but if the day be cloudy he remains out, as the weather is to be moderate."

Did you catch the phrase that cleared up my confusion in this matter? "According to the Germans." There it is. I'm surprised I didn't consider that. Normally when I find myself wondering, "Why would anyone think that?" or "Why would someone do such a thing?" - I automatically fall back on the same answer: They're probably Germans. It's like wearing long, dark socks with shorts and sandals. Germans think and do lots of stuff the rest of us will never understand. It's too bad we don't get paid vacations on all of our dumb holidays like the Germans... that's probably another reason they came up with this one.

So - Happy Groundhog Day, everyone! Get your groundhog some flowers or maybe some fragrant soaps. He needs to know you appreciate him, whether he uses his shadow-seeing ability to predict the weather or to simply host his own shadow puppet theater... today's that groundhog's day.

"Toy Story 3"

About a year ago Disney started development on "Toy Story 3"... without Pixar's help or consent. Disney didn't need consent - they owned the characters, so if they wanted to drag them through the mud, they were free to do it. Disney has a lot of mud. From what I understand, Pixar's disapproval of Disney's Toy Story 3 was one of the main reasons the two studios weren't getting along. Also, Eisner's an idiot... or stated in a more politically correct way: Eisner's "Retarded-American."

Yesterday, the first day after Disney's "takeover," Pixar's Ed Catmull and John Lasseter announced to the employees at Disney Feature Animation that production on Toy Story 3 has ended! I got the following quote from Animated News: "They said that sequels should only be made if there is a really great story that demands it, and they should be the domain of the artists who created the original film. So if Pixar wants to make a sequel to its films, it will. If Disney Feature Animation wants to make a sequel to its films, it will. But the two will not cross. "

I'm just adding this to yesterday's list of my reasons to be excited about Disney buying Pixar. I was dreading the arrival of that movie. Now if a Toy Story 3 is made, it will be made by Pixar, and it will be made because they have a really good story for it, not because kids like Buzz Lightyear and will blindly buy anything with him in it. This is a great approach for sequels, and it's nice to have Pixar's movies and characters back in Pixar's hands. I couldn't be happier about this news. That's why it's today's addition to the blog.

Disney & Pixar

As I'm sure you've already heard, yesterday Disney bought Pixar for $7.4 billion. I had considered doing the same, but cashing in all of my DVD's, CD's, and everything else I own still left me about $7.4 billion dollars short.

My first reaction to hearing that Disney was going to buy Pixar looked something like Darth Vader in "Revenge of the Sith" when the Emperor tells him that Padme is dead. I think the dialogue goes something like this: "Nooooo!" I then carried my hopes and dreams to an open field where I began digging a grave for them and the whole animation industry.

My problem with this transaction was the "Disney" part of it. Pixar has released six movies since 1995... six of the best animated films ever: Toy Story, A Bug's Life, Toy Story 2, Monsters, Inc., Finding Nemo, and The Incredibles. Disney, on the other hand, has recently released Chicken Little, Home on the Range, Atlantis, and Treasure Planet. It's obvious who's making the best movies... and it's not Disney. In recent years, a lot of people who grew up loving Disney's animated films have lost faith in Disney and turned to Pixar. I am one of them. Pixar has become the new Disney.

When I heard "Disney Buys Pixar," my first thought was that Disney's executives were going to do the "Eisner" thing and get over involved in the creative process they know very little about and begin messing up Pixar's ability to make films. Then I started reading articles about the terms of the deal and the changes Disney intends to make to their own animation division, and now it seems I'm ready to climb back on the Disney bandwagon that I threw myself off of years ago.

Here are some of the things things that changed my attitude about the deal:
1) Ed Catmull (President of Pixar) will serve as President of both studios. Instead of bringing the Pixar people over to work for Disney, the Disney folks will now be working for the Pixar people. They didn't buy the company as much as they bought the leadership.
2) John Lasseter (the creative leader of Pixar) is going to be the Chief Creative Officer of both Disney's and Pixar's animation studios. Perfect! Lasseter's great! He has also been named the Principal Creative Advisor for Disney Imagineering. That's the group that designs and creates the theme park attractions... meaning good things for them too.
3) Bob Iger (CEO of Disney) said, "I have really deeply committed to seeing to it that Pixar is allowed to exist in the form that it has existed, because that in my opinion is the single greatest thing that we can do to ensure that Pixar continues to be successful." The two animation studios will retain their current locations, and with Iger's dedication to leaving Pixar alone, it looks like Pixar won't have to deal with the interference from Disney that I most feared.
4) Roy Disney approves... therefore so do I. Roy's been a huge supporter of animation, and if he likes this deal based on all he knows, I have to agree with him.
5) David Stainton resigned! Hooray! He's been the president of Disney's Feature Animation for several years, and he's largely responsible for Disney's recent, terrible films. He declared 2D animation dead and did a bunch of other things that made me not like him. The director of a recent Disney feature said, "I LOVE the idea of Lasseter taking over Disney Feature! The only thing that would be better is if David Stainton is tazered, maced, and peppersprayed, and then frogmarched out of the building, stuffed into a burlap bag, and thrown into the L.A. river." Looks like I'm not the only one who's glad to see him go.
6) There are reports that Lasseter and his creative team may reinstate hand-drawn animation at Disney. Traditional animation may be saved by this deal, and that alone would have me cheering even if everything else I've said was left aside.

To sum up - the articles I've read about the buy-out of Pixar have completely changed my mind on the topic. What I thought was going to be the death of animation may actually be the best possible thing for it. The future looks good. Don't judge Disney on their next couple of movies... the effects of this deal won't be seen in Disney's films for a few years, but things are looking up. Pixar is still the best... now Disney has a chance to be saved by them, and it looks like that's the plan.

"Yo Ho" No Mo'?

The Pirates of the Caribbean... one of my favorite rides ever. It's a classic - but not for long. If you're a fan of that particular attraction at Disneyland like I am, you better get to it one last time before March 6 to say your final farewell. The Pirates of the Caribbean that you've grown to love will be no more. No, they're not getting rid of it, but the word from Disney is that it will be closed from March 6 to June 16 for "major refurbishments and show updates."

Show updates? What does that mean? A while back, legendary Disney animator Marc Davis did some pirate-themed sketches for Disney's Imagineering department. Those drawings inspired many of the scenes in the current Pirate attraction. Those scenes were so likeable that the ride itself eventually inspired a "Pirates of the Caribbean" film that you undoubtedly saw and probably own on DVD. I assume you've seen it, because it made $650 million at the worldwide box office, and that means pretty much everyone took part. And rightfully so... a fine film. But then the film's popularity surpassed the ride's popularity. Enter the idiots...

In the years since the release of the film, hosts and hostesses at City Hall in each of the Disney parks have fielded thousands of complaints that Captain Jack Sparrow never appears in his own ride. "Why would you base a ride on a movie and never even have your main character in it?" A simple answer: the movie was based on the ride. You're an idiot. Go home. But Disney doesn't think that way. In their minds, with at least two more Pirate film sequels in the works, they see this as the perfect opportunity to advertise the movies. And if that requires them to change the ride to match the movie that was originally inspired by the ride... well, that's exactly what they're doing.

How much are they going to change? That I don't know. Originally I had heard that the only change to the attraction would be the inclusion of one audio-animatronic "Captain Jack," but recent wording has me feeling a little nervous about what they plan to do... as stated above: "major refurbishments and show updates." If the changes are minimal, I suppose it's possible that I'll even like them. Supposedly Johnny Depp has even agreed to supply the voice for the new character, which is more than we can say for Indiana Jones in the Temple of the Forbidden Eye. But if they change a lot of one of my favorite rides, I'm going to be very disappointed. No - Disney doesn't have to run their decisions on this kind of thing by me, but it would certainly be nice. After all, in the dedication of Disneyland, Walt himself said, "Disneyland is your land." Stop messing with my land, Disney!

Luckily Disney's "Haunted Mansion" film didn't do well at the box office. If it had, they were planning on replacing Eleanor Audley (the voice of Maleficent in "Sleeping Beauty") with Jennifer Tilly for the part of Madame Leota. Her? I'm sure that a few of the dumber park guests have complained that Eddie Murphy isn't featured in the Haunted Mansion attraction... not an audio-animatronic figure, but the actual Eddie Murphy. He's pretty busy making Shrek movies, but perhaps they could get him on loan from Dream Works for several days a week.

So let's hope that the changes to Disneyland's Pirates of the Caribbean will be minimal. It's a shame to change a classic ride just to meet the expectations of a few disgruntled members of the generally idiotic public. If it ends up being cool, I'll apologize for these comments later. But for now it seems like Bambi II and the multiple upcoming Tinkerbell films... just another example of Disney's inability to leave perfect enough alone.

81 Points!

81 POINTS?! That's the holiest cow I've ever heard of in my 20 years as an NBA fan. Kobe is amazing! I didn't even hear about it until this morning. I wish I had seen the game... this kind of thing doesn't happen often. 55 of his points came in the second half! At halftime he just decided to whoop, and whoop he did!

Kobe Bryant is the best basketball player ever... he is better than Michael Jordan and me combined. (Also, Michael Jordan is better than Michael Jordan and me combined). To me Kobe is the most athletic, the most talented, and the most entertaining player in NBA history. You may hate him because you think he raped a girl in Colorado. You may hate him because the Lakers kept him instead of Shaq when the two of them weren't getting along. You may hate him because you hate the Lakers, and it bothers you that he's better than anyone on your favorite team. And some of you just hate him because you hate basketball in general... and hate is consuming your soul and turning you to the Dark Side... and that's sad. But you're going to have a hard time proving that Kobe's not the best player ever. So don't be a player hater... (I'm the whitest person on the planet). Just love the Kobe. 81 points in one night didn't make him the best ever... it just reminded me that I needed to blog about how he is. 81? Holiest cow!

The Muntjac & the Emu

This was inspired by something we saw at Lagoon a few months back... for some reason they've caged the muntjacs with the emus. Rather than a lamb and a lion, I dream of the muntjac and emu lying down together in peace. The combined cage is a big step in that direction. I hope to have actual news or rants one of these days, because I'm going to run out of drawings to post before long. Keep coming back to the blog!

My Giant Head

I have a gray BYU sweatshirt. It is no longer the shade of gray that it was when I bought it. Now it's more earthy, by which I mean it's brown and kind of gross. But I need a BYU sweatshirt so I'm easily identified by other Mormons when I go to Disneyland... which is weekly. So when I heard that the BYU Bookstore was having a sale on BYU sweatshirts (probably because of their football team's recent Las Vegas Bowl performance), I decided the time had come to find a replacement.

For those of you who don't know, and for this story to make sense, you should know that I have what is known as a "Garn Head." I am part Garn through my mom's side of the family, and I know which part is the most Garn... and that's my giant head. Most Garns have them. I have to special-order hats, because "One Size Fits All" doesn't fit me. So before my class last night I went to the BYU Bookstore in search of a new sweatshirt, accompanied as always by my giant Garn head.

As I stumbled blindly across the clothing section, running into a mirror and nearly knocking over a sale rack, I considered the letters "XXL" and how they clearly did not reflect the size of the neck hole. It seems the "zip up" sweatshirt is intended for me... like a draw bridge that opens to allow ships to pass freely through. If only I had known that before I forced the sweatshirt on, much of the destruction could have been avoided. But thanks to the jaws of life, I didn't have to buy the sweatshirt. It's still on the floor there in the Bookstore... its neck hole far too wide to be accomodated by any hanger this world has known. Not a proud moment for me. The Garn Head strikes again!

Let the Blogging Begin!

I just decided to start a blog today... welcome to it. I don't know why I felt like I needed a blog. I have several sites through MyFamily.com where I'm still going to be posting most of my important information that anyone would care to know. So why have a blog? I guess that the best part about a personal blog is that it will be all about ME... and that's a wagon I'll ride to the end of the earth. The nice thing here is that I get to choose the topics, and I get to decide who's allowed to post comments. If you got an email that directed you here, that's because I chose you from my email list as someone who I like to have around... someone to comment... someone to love.

So bookmark this page if you think you'll ever want to come back. I'll try to update it with meaningless rants and vacation reports at least a couple of times a week. Most of what you read here will make no sense, and I dare you to find something important or worthwhile in it... but it should be something to do if you have a job like mine that requires occasional internet browsing.

If I know someone who wants to be included and they didn't get an email from me and aren't a member of this blog, please let me know and get me their email addresses. The only reason I did the "members only" thing is because I don't want everyone on the planet making fun of me and my life... only people I know. Please come again... Let the blogging begin!

"Arrested Development"

I can't believe that the best show on TV is ending soon... and it's all because YOU didn't watch it. I feel safe saying that since no one watched it, and you're someone.

"As Bad As Can Be"

These are the characters from a VERY limited-animation short that a few of us put together based on an idea I had... it's about a buffalo with too much hair and an eagle with not enough. The characters are charmingly pathetic... and the song that goes with it continues to haunt my dreams.